








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1257 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 485 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5409 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,374 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3957 | 20% |
| Smokes | 5185 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 6211 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 4021 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,315,405 of utility $195 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 203 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hely | 65% | 31 |
| #2 | Mayhem | 52% | 459 |
| #3 | TheLuke | 50% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hely | 65% | 31 |
| #2 | Mayhem | 52% | 459 |
| #3 | TheLuke | 50% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mayhem | 31 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | Hely | 5 | 0.0074 |
| #3 | TheLuke | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mayhem | 698 | 0.07 | 17 min |
| #2 | Hely | 159 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #3 | TheLuke | 40 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hely | +2.27 | 79 | 65 |
| #2 | Mayhem | +1.21 | 77 | 51 |
| #3 | cav1 | -0.25 | 70 | 63 |
| #4 | TheLuke | -0.69 | 72 | 55 |





