








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 628 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 85 matches | ||
| Premier | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1558 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,467 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1442 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1254 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 435 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 1336 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $477,081 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 84 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lord Balls 27 | 59% | 29 |
| #2 | Banananana MAN | 55% | 168 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lord Balls 27 | 59% | 29 |
| #2 | Banananana MAN | 55% | 168 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Banananana MAN | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | Lord Balls 27 | 2 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Banananana MAN | 370 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #2 | Lord Balls 27 | 39 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hovic | +2.09 | 73 | 41 |
| #2 | Lord Balls 27 | +1.38 | 54 | 35 |
| #3 | Banananana MAN | +0.22 | 74 | 40 |





