








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 51 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 206 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3652 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,944 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1928 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1691 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1464 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1861 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $674,689 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 199 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⚡ Thor | 67% | 24 |
| #2 | Cruz | 53% | 19 |
| #3 | jex | 34% | 38 |
| #4 | Thebreaker | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⚡ Thor | 67% | 24 |
| #2 | Cruz | 53% | 19 |
| #3 | jex | 34% | 38 |
| #4 | Thebreaker | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cruz | 4 | 0.0119 |
| #2 | jex | 2 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | ⚡ Thor | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⚡ Thor | 93 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #2 | jex | 76 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Cruz | 64 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #4 | Thebreaker | 55 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boring | +2.75 | 86 | 58 |
| #2 | Cruz | +2.02 | 77 | 56 |
| #3 | Thebreaker | -1.56 | 75 | 70 |
| #4 | jex | -2.64 | 74 | 47 |
| #5 | ⚡ Thor | -3.25 | 57 | 44 |





