








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 77 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 91 matches | ||
| Wingman | 35 matches | ||
| Premier | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2106 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,763 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 913 | 24% |
| Smokes | 732 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1095 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1023 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $678,822 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 90 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝙬𝙀𝙧𝙙 | 93% | 14 |
| #2 | Shade | 88% | 40 |
| #3 | t4urtus | 72% | 60 |
| #4 | EEE | 71% | 14 |
| #5 | Leo | 68% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Specter | 66% | 131 |
| #7 | amic- | 64% | 14 |
| #8 | jrose | 58% | 12 |
| #9 | Betman | 58% | 12 |
| #10 | .AJ | 45% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Specter | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | t4urtus | 3 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Shade | 3 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | 𝙬𝙀𝙧𝙙 | 2 | 0.0076 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Specter | 563 | 0.21 | 15 min |
| #2 | t4urtus | 228 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #3 | Leo | 109 | 0.28 | 2 min |
| #4 | Shade | 108 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #5 | EEE | 55 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Destro | +2.31 | 77 | 49 |
| #2 | jrose | +2.11 | 91 | 55 |
| #3 | t4urtus | +1.91 | 84 | 71 |
| #4 | Shade | +1.49 | 66 | 56 |
| #5 | 𝙬𝙀𝙧𝙙 | +1.37 | 81 | 39 |





