








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 154 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1557 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,412 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2373 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1669 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1371 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 999 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $583,109 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 42 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | :D | 68% | 19 |
| #2 | botsukka | 55% | 20 |
| #3 | OG kuula | 49% | 77 |
| #4 | Eversti Sandels | 49% | 155 |
| #5 | BUMBA | 44% | 180 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | :D | 68% | 19 |
| #2 | botsukka | 55% | 20 |
| #3 | OG kuula | 49% | 77 |
| #4 | Eversti Sandels | 49% | 155 |
| #5 | BUMBA | 44% | 180 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eversti Sandels | 14 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | OG kuula | 10 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | BUMBA | 9 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | botsukka | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BUMBA | 212 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #2 | Eversti Sandels | 154 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #3 | OG kuula | 136 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | :D | 44 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | botsukka | 19 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OG kuula | +1.87 | 67 | 54 |
| #2 | botsukka | +1.09 | 58 | 23 |
| #3 | :D | +0.65 | 47 | 70 |
| #4 | Eversti Sandels | +0.25 | 44 | 53 |
| #5 | sLrBd | -0.06 | 36 | 65 |





