








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1270 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 385 matches | ||
| Faceit | 226 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8994 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,065 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3375 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4581 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3104 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4005 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,950,572 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 721 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flip | 55% | 199 |
| #2 | tmb | 52% | 235 |
| #3 | Djenis | 50% | 224 |
| #4 | l0wskilled | 50% | 234 |
| #5 | yung foccacia | 48% | 166 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Djenis | 28 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | l0wskilled | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | yung foccacia | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Flip | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | tmb | 2 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Djenis | 724 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| #2 | tmb | 692 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #3 | Flip | 664 | 0.16 | 16 min |
| #4 | l0wskilled | 512 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #5 | yung foccacia | 463 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tmb | +2.73 | 86 | 63 |
| #2 | CideR | +1.89 | 89 | 50 |
| #3 | Flip | +0.36 | 63 | 53 |
| #4 | yung foccacia | +0.12 | 76 | 68 |
| #5 | Djenis | +0.05 | 70 | 60 |





