








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 722 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 216 matches | ||
| Premier | 146 matches | ||
| Faceit | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7093 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,821 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7674 | 37% |
| Smokes | 3897 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 4289 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4961 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,038,299 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 517 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PliskinF | 69% | 32 |
| #2 | karmA^ | 62% | 101 |
| #3 | c0ke | 62% | 55 |
| #4 | Ivor Big Gun | 62% | 34 |
| #5 | GaZ | 58% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #18 | Nico | 41% | 37 |
| #19 | HKZ | 37% | 81 |
| #20 | Shameless^ | 36% | 36 |
| #21 | Lukey^Boy :-) | 33% | 52 |
| #22 | Princess Bubblegum | 31% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DaT | 698 | 0.21 | 19 min |
| #2 | ^らn☆fu WWG1WGA | 399 | 0.32 | 11 min |
| #3 | karmA^ | 283 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #4 | GaZ | 195 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #5 | c0ke | 183 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -B1ade- #dtd | +4.18 | 87 | 63 |
| #2 | DaT | +2.31 | 88 | 71 |
| #3 | Tabster | +2.06 | 61 | 67 |
| #4 | c0ke | +1.39 | 87 | 71 |
| #5 | PliskinF | +1.16 | 73 | 69 |





