








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 228 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
331 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 843 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 141 | 17% |
| Smokes | 239 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 203 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 260 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $450,239 of utility $395 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 52 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | donniepon | 88% | 17 |
| #2 | ImSellingMyHairline | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | ![]() Kinaso | 70% | 43 |
| #4 | adam | 62% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | donniepon | 88% | 17 |
| #2 | ImSellingMyHairline | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | ![]() Kinaso | 70% | 43 |
| #4 | adam | 62% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | adam | 8 | 0.0150 |
| #2 | ![]() Kinaso | 3 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | ImSellingMyHairline | 3 | 0.0341 |
| #4 | donniepon | 1 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | donniepon | 75 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #2 | adam | 46 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | ![]() Kinaso | 39 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | ImSellingMyHairline | 16 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ImSellingMyHairline | +7.46 | 28 | 49 |
| #2 | donniepon | +5.70 | 76 | 51 |
| #3 | adam | +5.25 | 50 | 54 |
| #4 | 「Mars」 | +0.65 | 61 | 32 |
| #5 | ![]() Kinaso | +0.13 | 56 | 35 |





