








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 110 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 143 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1136 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,658 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1291 | 35% |
| Smokes | 1048 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 894 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 425 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $559,170 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | K4p0t3uH | 64% | 14 |
| #2 | Logan | 50% | 14 |
| #3 | TEX_AWP [ON Twitch] | 38% | 112 |
| #4 | SpaceCowBoy | 33% | 9 |
| #5 | yrod | 31% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | K4p0t3uH | 64% | 14 |
| #2 | Logan | 50% | 14 |
| #3 | TEX_AWP [ON Twitch] | 38% | 112 |
| #4 | SpaceCowBoy | 33% | 9 |
| #5 | yrod | 31% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TEX_AWP [ON Twitch] | 13 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | yrod | 4 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | K4p0t3uH | 1 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | SpaceCowBoy | 1 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TEX_AWP [ON Twitch] | 484 | 0.20 | 12 min |
| #2 | Logan | 29 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #3 | yrod | 14 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #4 | SpaceCowBoy | 8 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #5 | K4p0t3uH | 7 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TEX_AWP [ON Twitch] | +3.34 | 82 | 63 |
| #2 | K4p0t3uH | +1.37 | 75 | 65 |
| #3 | yrod | -0.77 | 45 | 22 |
| #4 | MARINE | -1.01 | 46 | 39 |
| #5 | Logan | -1.43 | 56 | 58 |





