








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2080 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1527 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 145 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 105 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




176 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
14603 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 48,182 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9062 | 19% |
| Smokes | 16894 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 15760 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 6466 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $5,851,288 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 823 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | |H3NNA|!Norbika | 58% | 136 |
| #2 | Hydra | 49% | 142 |
| #3 | |H3NNA| 𝕯𝖗𝖆𝖌𝖎 | 45% | 354 |
| #4 | o.0 sh3rFF | 45% | 103 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | |H3NNA|!Norbika | 58% | 136 |
| #2 | Hydra | 49% | 142 |
| #3 | |H3NNA| 𝕯𝖗𝖆𝖌𝖎 | 45% | 354 |
| #4 | o.0 sh3rFF | 45% | 103 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | |H3NNA| 𝕯𝖗𝖆𝖌𝖎 | 22 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | o.0 sh3rFF | 15 | 0.0072 |
| #3 | |H3NNA|!Norbika | 9 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | Hydra | 7 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | |H3NNA| 𝕯𝖗𝖆𝖌𝖎 | 1452 | 0.20 | 38 min |
| #2 | Hydra | 411 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #3 | o.0 sh3rFF | 326 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| #4 | |H3NNA|!Norbika | 235 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | |H3NNA|!Norbika | +1.55 | 55 | 62 |
| #2 | o.0 sh3rFF | +1.15 | 66 | 73 |
| #3 | Szivasz_Easyy | +0.68 | 60 | 61 |
| #4 | Hydra | -0.30 | 44 | 59 |
| #5 | |H3NNA| 𝕯𝖗𝖆𝖌𝖎 | -2.21 | 18 | 70 |





