








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 60 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 197 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2540 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,586 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1473 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1037 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1607 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1469 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $785,473 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Golden Dope | 61% | 74 |
| #2 | hipfiar.com | 54% | 26 |
| #3 | rafael | 51% | 45 |
| #4 | Frisky | 41% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Golden Dope | 61% | 74 |
| #2 | hipfiar.com | 54% | 26 |
| #3 | rafael | 51% | 45 |
| #4 | Frisky | 41% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Golden Dope | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | rafael | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | hipfiar.com | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rafael | 311 | 0.31 | 8 min |
| #2 | Golden Dope | 60 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #3 | Frisky | 51 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | hipfiar.com | 43 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stunna | +2.36 | 63 | 50 |
| #2 | rafael | +1.96 | 77 | 66 |
| #3 | Golden Dope | -0.05 | 40 | 37 |
| #4 | Frisky | -2.33 | 39 | 39 |
| #5 | hipfiar.com | -3.28 | 14 | 43 |





