








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 304 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 39 matches | ||
| Wingman | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1264 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,868 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1072 | 37% |
| Smokes | 545 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 790 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 461 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $570,882 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 43 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Думай головой | 67% | 12 |
| #2 | mindless talentless | 59% | 17 |
| #3 | seriker | 53% | 34 |
| #4 | оксимирон покурил зазу | 52% | 65 |
| #5 | Endura | 50% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | оксимирон покурил зазу | 15 | 0.0117 |
| #2 | Энкефалиновая Сладость | 11 | 0.0060 |
| #3 | fuwafuwa | 4 | 0.0095 |
| #4 | mindless talentless | 3 | 0.0105 |
| #5 | lesocheck | 2 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Endura | +6.88 | 77 | 30 |
| #2 | Думай головой | +6.12 | 35 | 51 |
| #3 | mindless talentless | +5.97 | 88 | 35 |
| #4 | seriker | +5.29 | 89 | 43 |
| #5 | оксимирон покурил зазу | +5.02 | 83 | 15 |





