








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 651 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 294 matches | ||
| Faceit | 145 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3817 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,703 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5088 | 25% |
| Smokes | 6521 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 4256 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4838 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,546,949 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 223 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | ✪ Dilly | 47% | 159 |
| #7 | Seth | 39% | 41 |
| #8 | Michael Cera | 36% | 28 |
| #9 | REASON | 32% | 34 |
| #10 | finley | 29% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Dilly | 11 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | Plat | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | SLiiDE | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | ttoney | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Busdriver | 3 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ttoney | 378 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| #2 | ✪ Dilly | 227 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #3 | SLiiDE | 209 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | Busdriver | 189 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #5 | Plat | 174 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Plat | +2.81 | 89 | 40 |
| #2 | SLiiDE | +0.62 | 58 | 57 |
| #3 | ttoney | +0.04 | 54 | 49 |
| #4 | EanSKUD | -0.07 | 63 | 79 |
| #5 | ✪ Dilly | -0.42 | 55 | 49 |





