








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 166 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2328 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,388 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1526 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1802 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1841 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2219 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $429,186 of utility $93 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 545 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | n3sraL cs.money | 79% | 19 |
| #2 | Chaze | 77% | 13 |
| #3 | ✪ 0NCE™✪ | 71% | 24 |
| #4 | R. | 69% | 71 |
| #5 | Samson | 66% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Samson | 66% | 44 |
| #6 | Hakon | 65% | 96 |
| #7 | Ezio | 55% | 20 |
| #8 | Kulde | 52% | 87 |
| #9 | Niklas | 44% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hakon | 15 | 0.0082 |
| #2 | Kulde | 12 | 0.0066 |
| #3 | Samson | 9 | 0.0107 |
| #4 | ✪ 0NCE™✪ | 7 | 0.0142 |
| #5 | R. | 5 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hakon | 416 | 0.23 | 9 min |
| #2 | Kulde | 226 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | R. | 206 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #4 | Chaze | 135 | 0.51 | 3 min |
| #5 | Niklas | 65 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R. | +2.34 | 71 | 73 |
| #2 | クリス | +2.13 | 76 | 61 |
| #3 | Kulde | +1.96 | 79 | 65 |
| #4 | Hakon | +1.53 | 66 | 68 |
| #5 | ✪ 0NCE™✪ | +1.09 | 84 | 73 |





