








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 366 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 112 matches | ||
| Wingman | 37 matches | ||
| Premier | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2571 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,494 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1856 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2346 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1465 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1827 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $625,785 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 49 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vihainen-Possu | 63% | 41 |
| #2 | eps7ein | 57% | 53 |
| #3 | grinch | 55% | 129 |
| #4 | streak | 52% | 50 |
| #5 | Walter | 52% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vihainen-Possu | 63% | 41 |
| #2 | eps7ein | 57% | 53 |
| #3 | grinch | 55% | 129 |
| #4 | streak | 52% | 50 |
| #5 | Walter | 52% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | grinch | 6 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Vihainen-Possu | 3 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | Walter | 3 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | streak | 2 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | eps7ein | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | grinch | 184 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #2 | streak | 144 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| #3 | Vihainen-Possu | 84 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | eps7ein | 60 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | Walter | 47 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Misty | +2.06 | 66 | 59 |
| #2 | Vihainen-Possu | +0.93 | 76 | 58 |
| #3 | grinch | -0.19 | 66 | 55 |
| #4 | eps7ein | -0.61 | 60 | 44 |
| #5 | Walter | -2.47 | 59 | 35 |





