










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
387 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 947 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 313 | 33% |
| Smokes | 195 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 296 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 143 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $219,289 of utility $209 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 32 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr_Hardor | 40% | 45 |
| #2 | Dowagro | 38% | 24 |
| #3 | ufix | 20% | 5 |
| #4 | łค๒єןєเςรєเק | 18% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr_Hardor | 40% | 45 |
| #2 | Dowagro | 38% | 24 |
| #3 | ufix | 20% | 5 |
| #4 | łค๒єןєเςรєเק | 18% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr_Hardor | 4 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | ufix | 1 | 0.0110 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr_Hardor | 303 | 0.32 | 8 min |
| #2 | łค๒єןєเςรєเק | 50 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #3 | Dowagro | 37 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | ufix | 5 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr_Hardor | +1.89 | 59 | 62 |
| #2 | CoconutRevenge | -1.34 | 35 | 41 |
| #3 | ufix | -2.35 | 56 | 53 |
| #4 | Dowagro | -2.59 | 48 | 46 |
| #5 | łค๒єןєเςรєเק | -3.21 | 49 | 60 |





