








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1976 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 926 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 184 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




159 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11263 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,794 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9202 | 26% |
| Smokes | 7268 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 10690 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 8634 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,685,468 of utility $75 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2997 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reimo Räim Laks | 58% | 95 |
| #2 | C H I L L | 54% | 132 |
| #3 | AtomicHyper | 50% | 169 |
| #4 | Juutkahoot666 | 46% | 113 |
| #5 | AtomicHype | 45% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reimo Räim Laks | 58% | 95 |
| #2 | C H I L L | 54% | 132 |
| #3 | AtomicHyper | 50% | 169 |
| #4 | Juutkahoot666 | 46% | 113 |
| #5 | AtomicHype | 45% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AtomicHype | 9 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | AtomicHyper | 7 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Juutkahoot666 | 6 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Reimo Räim Laks | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | C H I L L | 2 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juutkahoot666 | 256 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #2 | C H I L L | 246 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #3 | AtomicHyper | 194 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #4 | AtomicHype | 132 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | Reimo Räim Laks | 103 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KOKSAJA | +1.63 | 66 | 58 |
| #2 | AtomicHype | +0.43 | 59 | 58 |
| #3 | AtomicHyper | +0.38 | 57 | 56 |
| #4 | C H I L L | +0.31 | 58 | 63 |
| #5 | Reimo Räim Laks | -0.14 | 54 | 49 |





