








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 120 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 86 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
739 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,574 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 626 | 24% |
| Smokes | 692 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 533 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 723 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $427,641 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 21 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Яɒzɘ8 ⅃OTИOʞ | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | ODAHNE | 41% | 17 |
| #3 | Johnny la gente está muy loca | 31% | 16 |
| #4 | A N T I S O C I A L I S T | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Яɒzɘ8 ⅃OTИOʞ | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | ODAHNE | 41% | 17 |
| #3 | Johnny la gente está muy loca | 31% | 16 |
| #4 | A N T I S O C I A L I S T | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ODAHNE | 2 | 0.0057 |
| #2 | Johnny la gente está muy loca | 2 | 0.0061 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Яɒzɘ8 ⅃OTИOʞ | 48 | 0.27 | 1 min |
| #2 | Johnny la gente está muy loca | 41 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #3 | A N T I S O C I A L I S T | 36 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | ODAHNE | 18 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ODAHNE | +3.83 | 43 | 39 |
| #2 | Johnny la gente está muy loca | +1.01 | 31 | 26 |
| #3 | Яɒzɘ8 ⅃OTИOʞ | -0.66 | 38 | 57 |
| #4 | OMEGA3 | -1.76 | 18 | 40 |
| #5 | A N T I S O C I A L I S T | -5.10 | 1 | 42 |





