








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1040 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 363 matches | ||
| Wingman | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3337 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,787 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5640 | 36% |
| Smokes | 4248 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2584 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 3315 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,548,259 of utility $211 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1023 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nicksick | 43% | 247 |
| #2 | Moloch16 | 38% | 74 |
| #3 | D1amond | 33% | 36 |
| #4 | sQuiDwArD | 29% | 59 |
| #5 | keefthan | 28% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nicksick | 43% | 247 |
| #2 | Moloch16 | 38% | 74 |
| #3 | D1amond | 33% | 36 |
| #4 | sQuiDwArD | 29% | 59 |
| #5 | keefthan | 28% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moloch16 | 7 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | nicksick | 3 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | sQuiDwArD | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | keefthan | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | D1amond | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moloch16 | 249 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #2 | nicksick | 220 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #3 | keefthan | 86 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | sQuiDwArD | 75 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | D1amond | 56 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moloch16 | +2.82 | 81 | 69 |
| #2 | jackamoke | -0.48 | 34 | 61 |
| #3 | D1amond | -1.31 | 42 | 53 |
| #4 | sQuiDwArD | -1.78 | 44 | 31 |
| #5 | keefthan | -2.05 | 44 | 40 |





