








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 138 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1455 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,393 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 412 | 17% |
| Smokes | 850 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 443 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 688 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $414,455 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frosty_Cube | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | Kappa | 56% | 103 |
| #3 | the floop | 55% | 20 |
| #4 | los cojones | 52% | 46 |
| #5 | doosja | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frosty_Cube | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | Kappa | 56% | 103 |
| #3 | the floop | 55% | 20 |
| #4 | los cojones | 52% | 46 |
| #5 | doosja | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kappa | 10 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | los cojones | 10 | 0.0110 |
| #3 | the floop | 5 | 0.0123 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | los cojones | 101 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #2 | Kappa | 89 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #3 | doosja | 14 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #4 | Frosty_Cube | 13 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | the floop | 11 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ImJustMe | +3.27 | 81 | 52 |
| #2 | the floop | +0.23 | 61 | 26 |
| #3 | Frosty_Cube | +0.05 | 57 | 43 |
| #4 | los cojones | -0.97 | 65 | 46 |
| #5 | Kappa | -1.14 | 52 | 27 |





