








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 51 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 28 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
1142 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 945 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 94 | 10% |
| Smokes | 116 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 415 | 44% |
| Molotovs | 320 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $142,824 of utility $72 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Alpha X/Lukas | 56% | 43 |
| #6 | xXFabsterXx | 50% | 22 |
| #7 | POG | 48% | 21 |
| #8 | Don_Black | 47% | 19 |
| #9 | CYKAWATTE_BLYAD.CS.PRO | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | POG | 3 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | xXFabsterXx | 2 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | Don_Black | 2 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | ѕнєєѕн™ | 2 | 0.0156 |
| #5 | 4geT ◉_◉ | 1 | 0.0056 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alpha X/Lukas | 67 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #2 | POG | 26 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #3 | xXFabsterXx | 23 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #4 | CYKAWATTE_BLYAD.CS.PRO | 13 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #5 | Don_Black | 12 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rob Otter | +2.68 | 58 | 28 |
| #2 | Alpha X/Lukas | +2.30 | 69 | 41 |
| #3 | xXFabsterXx | +1.74 | 36 | 47 |
| #4 | ѕнєєѕн™ | +1.37 | 72 | 71 |
| #5 | 4geT ◉_◉ | +0.95 | 67 | 56 |





