








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 457 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 48 matches | ||
| Esplay | 14 matches | 1,572 | |
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1119 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,212 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 876 | 27% |
| Smokes | 667 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 848 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 821 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $492,153 of utility $209 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 51 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | FLÄÄTIGO ("GustavssoN") ツ | 49% | 53 |
| #7 | FLÄÄTIGO DJ Orvar ツ | 47% | 17 |
| #8 | FLÄÄTIGO f0rsm4n | 45% | 20 |
| #9 | PRIPPÄ Joh4nzzon ツ | 40% | 30 |
| #10 | Gunnarsson | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PRIPPÄ Joh4nzzon ツ | 7 | 0.0105 |
| #2 | Fnajen | 5 | 0.0168 |
| #3 | FLÄÄTIGO ("GustavssoN") ツ | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | FLÄÄTIGO f0rsm4n | 2 | 0.0046 |
| #5 | FLÄÄTIGO DJ Orvar ツ | 2 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FLÄÄTIGO ("GustavssoN") ツ | 131 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #2 | PRIPPÄ Joh4nzzon ツ | 94 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #3 | FLÄÄTIGO DJ Orvar ツ | 74 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #4 | neger | 66 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #5 | Fnajen | 53 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FLÄÄTIGO DJ Orvar ツ | +5.72 | 88 | 52 |
| #2 | Fnajen | +4.62 | 75 | 43 |
| #3 | neger | +2.46 | 69 | 47 |
| #4 | FLÄÄTIGO ("GustavssoN") ツ | +0.67 | 68 | 69 |
| #5 | MrCallisto | +0.42 | 61 | 69 |





