








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 47 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
657 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,883 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 697 | 37% |
| Smokes | 477 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 249 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 460 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $86,776 of utility $100 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 87 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gustave Dore | 88% | 16 |
| #2 | sobeit | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | kotyk | 60% | 10 |
| #4 | wast3d | 57% | 7 |
| #5 | Shlyaperson | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gustave Dore | 88% | 16 |
| #2 | sobeit | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | kotyk | 60% | 10 |
| #4 | wast3d | 57% | 7 |
| #5 | Shlyaperson | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gustave Dore | 1 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | Shlyaperson | 1 | 0.0135 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gustave Dore | 57 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #2 | wast3d | 24 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #3 | Shlyaperson | 15 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #4 | kotyk | 9 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #5 | sobeit | 6 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xxlafy lft | +3.97 | 84 | 67 |
| #2 | Gustave Dore | +3.18 | 91 | 70 |
| #3 | kotyk | +1.90 | 96 | 52 |
| #4 | Shlyaperson | +1.29 | 85 | 60 |
| #5 | sobeit | +0.76 | 44 | 76 |





