










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 37 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1231 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,353 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 437 | 32% |
| Smokes | 331 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 105 | 8% |
| Molotovs | 480 | 35% |
Our logs show you have wasted $346,713 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | • ɴɪɪ • | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | EP | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Cháu rể Mỹ Tâm | 1 | 0.0071 |
| #4 | Massiv3 | 1 | 0.0105 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dubidubidubadu | +4.27 | 71 | 29 |
| #2 | Kanontsistonties | +3.92 | 71 | 52 |
| #3 | 𐂃𐂃 | +3.00 | 80 | 51 |
| #4 | Massiv3 | +0.32 | 87 | 43 |
| #5 | Cháu rể Mỹ Tâm | -0.44 | 38 | 56 |





