








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 538 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 535 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 69 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




78 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5779 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 33,085 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8947 | 27% |
| Smokes | 9298 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 7889 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 6951 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,290,258 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 811 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kodawari | 52% | 188 |
| #2 | Do cRy | 50% | 115 |
| #3 | Xeter | 46% | 140 |
| #4 | Big Sik | 33% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kodawari | 52% | 188 |
| #2 | Do cRy | 50% | 115 |
| #3 | Xeter | 46% | 140 |
| #4 | Big Sik | 33% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xeter | 22 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | Kodawari | 15 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | Do cRy | 10 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | Big Sik | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kodawari | 337 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #2 | Do cRy | 320 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #3 | Big Sik | 97 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | Xeter | 49 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Do cRy | +2.85 | 70 | 62 |
| #2 | Kamelo | +0.66 | 46 | 69 |
| #3 | Xeter | +0.38 | 57 | 30 |
| #4 | Kodawari | -0.99 | 72 | 45 |
| #5 | Big Sik | -2.94 | 41 | 56 |





