








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 79 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
291 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 994 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 512 | 52% |
| Smokes | 300 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 144 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 38 | 4% |
Our logs show you have wasted $49,150 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 64 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [GER]olafmeister | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | Dabi | 50% | 26 |
| #3 | S4CKH44R|Ripper | 43% | 28 |
| #4 | WiSeR | 40% | 10 |
| #5 | clyde87 | 27% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [GER]olafmeister | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | Dabi | 50% | 26 |
| #3 | S4CKH44R|Ripper | 43% | 28 |
| #4 | WiSeR | 40% | 10 |
| #5 | clyde87 | 27% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | S4CKH44R|Ripper | 3 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | WiSeR | 1 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | S4CKH44R|Ripper | 43 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #2 | Dabi | 32 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #3 | [GER]olafmeister | 10 | 0.16 | 0 min |
| #4 | clyde87 | 7 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #5 | WiSeR | 7 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wolfix | +2.49 | 63 | 58 |
| #2 | WiSeR | +1.96 | 53 | 48 |
| #3 | [GER]olafmeister | +1.92 | 56 | 57 |
| #4 | Dabi | +1.38 | 68 | 62 |
| #5 | S4CKH44R|Ripper | -1.30 | 39 | 55 |





