










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 708 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Esplay | 168 matches | 1,800 | |
| Premier | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
1752 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,263 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 690 | 13% |
| Smokes | 1285 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1979 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 1309 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $953,726 of utility $239 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 430 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HSP LilForce♕ | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | -lidde | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Amaranthine | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hawkish | +3.83 | 87 | 60 |
| #2 | -lidde | +3.43 | 88 | 56 |
| #3 | HSP LilForce♕ | +0.41 | 74 | 68 |
| #4 | Kahba | +0.25 | 54 | 65 |
| #5 | Hans Dahlgren | +0.16 | 44 | 50 |





