








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2248 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 369 matches | ||
| Wingman | 30 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4714 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,504 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5315 | 32% |
| Smokes | 5454 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 1917 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 3818 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,622,918 of utility $183 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 255 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | doe nutz | 58% | 33 |
| #2 | Fisiks | 55% | 29 |
| #3 | Ting | 53% | 32 |
| #4 | Hangle. | 52% | 84 |
| #5 | ☭⭕⃤☭⭕⃤☭⭕⃤ Dan | 50% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | ☭⭕⃤☭⭕⃤☭⭕⃤ Dan | 50% | 84 |
| #6 | FRX Keen | 50% | 134 |
| #7 | Cryptic | 48% | 189 |
| #8 | Orau | 46% | 39 |
| #9 | Eskeeeeeeeeeeeetit gamdom.com | 45% | 118 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☭⭕⃤☭⭕⃤☭⭕⃤ Dan | 11 | 0.0062 |
| #2 | Cryptic | 7 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Hangle. | 7 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | FRX Keen | 6 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Fisiks | 6 | 0.0099 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cryptic | 622 | 0.15 | 17 min |
| #2 | FRX Keen | 456 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #3 | Eskeeeeeeeeeeeetit gamdom.com | 236 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #4 | ☭⭕⃤☭⭕⃤☭⭕⃤ Dan | 219 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | Hangle. | 206 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ting | +4.95 | 90 | 58 |
| #2 | cheva | +1.89 | 72 | 64 |
| #3 | FRX Keen | +0.83 | 86 | 54 |
| #4 | Fisiks | -0.31 | 79 | 53 |
| #5 | Cryptic | -0.44 | 66 | 64 |





