








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 815 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 103 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5477 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,666 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3642 | 34% |
| Smokes | 3757 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 1040 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 2227 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,109,122 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 182 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C. Matrix | 63% | 194 |
| #2 | Warf Rat | 61% | 171 |
| #3 | The Mogger | 60% | 175 |
| #4 | okaywam | 59% | 158 |
| #5 | Mr_Clean | 56% | 154 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪M3mer | +5.49 | 88 | 55 |
| #2 | Vostria ツ | +2.50 | 81 | 63 |
| #3 | okaywam | +2.16 | 72 | 74 |
| #4 | The Mogger | +0.41 | 82 | 31 |
| #5 | C. Matrix | -0.52 | 68 | 57 |





