








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 90 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
707 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,163 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 375 | 17% |
| Smokes | 792 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 617 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 379 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $429,058 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 149 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KyZan^ | 60% | 10 |
| #2 | d1t -iwnl- | 43% | 109 |
| #3 | Aizen | 42% | 88 |
| #4 | Mike With One I | 42% | 72 |
| #5 | jonneh | 38% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mike With One I | 23 | 0.0153 |
| #2 | Aizen | 8 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | d1t -iwnl- | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | jonneh | 4 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | d1t -iwnl- | 248 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #2 | Mike With One I | 130 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | Aizen | 124 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | jonneh | 43 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | KyZan^ | 29 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KyZan^ | +3.06 | 83 | 60 |
| #2 | d1t -iwnl- | +3.06 | 77 | 46 |
| #3 | Mike With One I | +1.71 | 74 | 58 |
| #4 | Aizen | -0.90 | 69 | 56 |
| #5 | Aurie | -2.15 | 60 | 49 |





