










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
527 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,186 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 520 | 24% |
| Smokes | 526 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 540 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 600 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $177,127 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 104 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reyster | 45% | 42 |
| #2 | Mommy | 33% | 3 |
| #3 | Chestbrah | 31% | 13 |
| #4 | Jelle #24k | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reyster | 45% | 42 |
| #2 | Mommy | 33% | 3 |
| #3 | Chestbrah | 31% | 13 |
| #4 | Jelle #24k | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reyster | 8 | 0.0090 |
| #2 | Chestbrah | 1 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reyster | 154 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #2 | Chestbrah | 52 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #3 | Jelle #24k | 20 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #4 | Mommy | 6 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mommy | +1.11 | 97 | 51 |
| #2 | Reyster | +0.22 | 75 | 65 |
| #3 | Fr3D | -0.01 | 74 | 64 |
| #4 | Jelle #24k | -1.04 | 72 | 54 |
| #5 | Chestbrah | -1.12 | 82 | 61 |





