








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 316 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 92 matches | ||
| Premier | 50 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2121 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,826 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1843 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2140 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2257 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1586 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $682,243 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 58 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nile | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | U.S.S.R doGe ☭ | 61% | 33 |
| #3 | **𝓡𝓸𝓴𝔂𝔂** | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | IMA | 56% | 48 |
| #5 | kerma | 52% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IMA | 8 | 0.0085 |
| #2 | U.S.S.R doGe ☭ | 4 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | kerma | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #4 | Nile | 1 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kerma | 199 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #2 | U.S.S.R doGe ☭ | 135 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #3 | IMA | 91 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | SK3D | 75 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Vinski | 35 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nile | +4.08 | 69 | 69 |
| #2 | IMA | +0.38 | 76 | 59 |
| #3 | HÖRÖNAURUT | +0.35 | 69 | 71 |
| #4 | kerma | +0.24 | 74 | 61 |
| #5 | SK3D | -0.21 | 66 | 56 |





