








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 92 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
263 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 742 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 269 | 36% |
| Smokes | 158 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 213 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 102 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $178,246 of utility $243 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Majdooo | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | Leopold Kašing | 67% | 9 |
| #3 | chaddy | 50% | 36 |
| #4 | FearHowl | 33% | 9 |
| #5 | ElKraloo | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Majdooo | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | Leopold Kašing | 67% | 9 |
| #3 | chaddy | 50% | 36 |
| #4 | FearHowl | 33% | 9 |
| #5 | ElKraloo | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ElKraloo | 3 | 0.0130 |
| #2 | Leopold Kašing | 2 | 0.0132 |
| #3 | chaddy | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chaddy | 94 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #2 | ElKraloo | 36 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #3 | FearHowl | 9 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #4 | Leopold Kašing | 6 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chaddy | +4.74 | 80 | 57 |
| #2 | Leopold Kašing | -0.16 | 85 | 53 |
| #3 | FearHowl | -2.69 | 66 | 44 |
| #4 | Air Bud | -3.39 | 44 | 52 |
| #5 | ElKraloo | -4.25 | 37 | 65 |





