








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 409 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 106 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 62 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1312 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,798 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1349 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1789 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 807 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 853 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $839,306 of utility $183 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 437 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PEPSI | 48% | 86 |
| #2 | 🗿⃤⃢Dave. | 44% | 72 |
| #3 | burr | 43% | 28 |
| #4 | Mrs. Puff | 42% | 52 |
| #5 | Ganskenau | 39% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | burr | 43% | 28 |
| #4 | Mrs. Puff | 42% | 52 |
| #5 | Ganskenau | 39% | 28 |
| #6 | 🗿⃤⃢TetraHC | 39% | 23 |
| #7 | Jay-BonG | 35% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PEPSI | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | 🗿⃤⃢Dave. | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | burr | 3 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | Jay-BonG | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 🗿⃤⃢Dave. | 78 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #2 | PEPSI | 70 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #3 | burr | 70 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | Ganskenau | 68 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | 🗿⃤⃢TetraHC | 52 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ganskenau | +5.05 | 57 | 61 |
| #2 | 🗿⃤⃢TetraHC | +0.86 | 64 | 63 |
| #3 | Mrs. Puff | +0.53 | 43 | 48 |
| #4 | Lion Cereals | +0.38 | 47 | 51 |
| #5 | 🗿⃤⃢Dave. | -0.31 | 47 | 57 |





