








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 81 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
457 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,185 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 404 | 34% |
| Smokes | 321 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 147 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 313 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $104,794 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lozah G | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | Boober | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | Obi1UKnowMe | 75% | 4 |
| #4 | dracu' de ✪Mo⸸an⭕⃤ ™ | 75% | 8 |
| #5 | ThatOneGuy | 71% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frosty. | 1 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | Boober | 1 | 0.0088 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frosty. | 26 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #2 | dracu' de ✪Mo⸸an⭕⃤ ™ | 23 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| #3 | Lozah G | 14 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #4 | ThatOneGuy | 10 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | Boober | 4 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lozah G | +4.02 | 80 | 57 |
| #2 | Obi1UKnowMe | +2.44 | 89 | 43 |
| #3 | Xenon | +1.83 | 83 | 64 |
| #4 | Frosty. | +1.01 | 63 | 67 |
| #5 | ThatOneGuy | +0.39 | 75 | 45 |





