








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1090 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 116 matches | ||
| Premier | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 82 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Renown | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 88 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




126 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4376 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,272 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8421 | 31% |
| Smokes | 5539 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 7132 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 6180 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $966,166 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1997 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smöks | 52% | 75 |
| #2 | My beloved husband | 50% | 105 |
| #3 | Reivitaavi | 38% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smöks | 52% | 75 |
| #2 | My beloved husband | 50% | 105 |
| #3 | Reivitaavi | 38% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | My beloved husband | 25 | 0.0118 |
| #2 | Smöks | 11 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | Reivitaavi | 3 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smöks | 208 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #2 | My beloved husband | 196 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #3 | Reivitaavi | 77 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smöks | +3.65 | 87 | 71 |
| #2 | My beloved husband | +2.62 | 61 | 48 |
| #3 | IOL9TBIMC | +0.49 | 44 | 75 |
| #4 | Reivitaavi | -1.03 | 69 | 54 |





