








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 633 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 307 matches | ||
| Faceit | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 43 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5880 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,095 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2399 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1640 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 2861 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3195 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,995,733 of utility $219 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 363 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nomad_ | 70% | 23 |
| #2 | BOMBA | 53% | 32 |
| #3 | siblos | 50% | 270 |
| #4 | Lil Big Man | 48% | 33 |
| #5 | Sid | 48% | 170 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | BOMBA | 53% | 32 |
| #3 | siblos | 50% | 270 |
| #4 | Lil Big Man | 48% | 33 |
| #5 | Sid | 48% | 170 |
| #6 | bro? | 46% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sid | 11 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | siblos | 10 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | bro? | 5 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | Lil Big Man | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | siblos | 1097 | 0.19 | 28 min |
| #2 | Sid | 640 | 0.18 | 20 min |
| #3 | Lil Big Man | 226 | 0.33 | 7 min |
| #4 | bro? | 178 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #5 | Nomad_ | 62 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jroo | +2.08 | 71 | 54 |
| #2 | BOMBA | +1.12 | 71 | 57 |
| #3 | Nomad_ | +0.62 | 67 | 53 |
| #4 | Sid | -0.82 | 62 | 71 |
| #5 | Lil Big Man | -1.44 | 54 | 73 |





