








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 318 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 174 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




106 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2568 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,187 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3078 | 43% |
| Smokes | 1692 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1529 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 888 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,014,754 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 188 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | overminded | 46% | 50 |
| #2 | Sandelssii | 39% | 101 |
| #3 | ezr- | 37% | 99 |
| #4 | Ali Salem Rahmed Mahmud Mehmed | 34% | 102 |
| #5 | loob | 32% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Sandelssii | 39% | 101 |
| #3 | ezr- | 37% | 99 |
| #4 | Ali Salem Rahmed Mahmud Mehmed | 34% | 102 |
| #5 | loob | 32% | 53 |
| #6 | taneli | 28% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sandelssii | 28 | 0.0139 |
| #2 | Ali Salem Rahmed Mahmud Mehmed | 13 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | ezr- | 10 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | loob | 10 | 0.0092 |
| #5 | taneli | 4 | 0.0121 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sandelssii | 342 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #2 | ezr- | 317 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #3 | Ali Salem Rahmed Mahmud Mehmed | 214 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | loob | 109 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | taneli | 51 | 0.15 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ezr- | +3.19 | 75 | 72 |
| #2 | Ali Salem Rahmed Mahmud Mehmed | +0.48 | 77 | 30 |
| #3 | ♛NoS♛ | -0.16 | 69 | 55 |
| #4 | loob | -0.24 | 71 | 45 |
| #5 | overminded | -0.65 | 54 | 54 |





