










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 16 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
310 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,010 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 391 | 39% |
| Smokes | 203 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 242 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 174 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $102,300 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 52 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Munapiiks | 63% | 27 |
| #2 | kief | 59% | 27 |
| #3 | P4P4j3V | 58% | 19 |
| #4 | Juku | 54% | 37 |
| #5 | ็ | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Munapiiks | 63% | 27 |
| #2 | kief | 59% | 27 |
| #3 | P4P4j3V | 58% | 19 |
| #4 | Juku | 54% | 37 |
| #5 | ็ | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juku | 19 | 0.0261 |
| #2 | kief | 14 | 0.0273 |
| #3 | P4P4j3V | 9 | 0.0236 |
| #4 | Munapiiks | 8 | 0.0156 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juku | 108 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #2 | Munapiiks | 68 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | kief | 35 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | ็ | 17 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #5 | P4P4j3V | 4 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juku | +3.30 | 73 | 51 |
| #2 | kief | +1.23 | 65 | 51 |
| #3 | ็ | +0.97 | 33 | 32 |
| #4 | Munapiiks | +0.87 | 54 | 44 |
| #5 | aiku | -1.74 | 55 | 52 |





