








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 557 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 175 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Faceit | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5257 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,339 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4059 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3376 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3334 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3570 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,044,473 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 255 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chad kirbo | 59% | 29 |
| #2 | Taco Taco Enchilada | 55% | 139 |
| #3 | moosenaround | 54% | 28 |
| #4 | NOWAH | 53% | 57 |
| #5 | f4te | 53% | 173 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Taco Taco Enchilada | 383 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #2 | VOODOO =DD! | 301 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #3 | nhoJ | 242 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #4 | NOWAH | 228 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #5 | f4te | 193 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Avner | +3.32 | 84 | 60 |
| #2 | Gonzo | +2.52 | 86 | 52 |
| #3 | NOWAH | +2.06 | 84 | 67 |
| #4 | VOODOO =DD! | +1.10 | 85 | 59 |
| #5 | ..Dot | +0.09 | 78 | 78 |





