








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 35 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
417 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,312 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 266 | 20% |
| Smokes | 412 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 317 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 317 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $116,141 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 29 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Siljeeeh | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | choco | 75% | 4 |
| #3 | Tumppis | 71% | 17 |
| #4 | JUS6 | 69% | 16 |
| #5 | Best-Potato | 67% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | JUS6 | 69% | 16 |
| #5 | Best-Potato | 67% | 3 |
| #6 | Fareva | 67% | 15 |
| #7 | zyntix | 64% | 14 |
| #8 | JulleS | 50% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JUS6 | 2 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JUS6 | 82 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #2 | Tumppis | 69 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #3 | zyntix | 62 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #4 | Fareva | 38 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | JulleS | 26 | 0.26 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | choco | +3.47 | 82 | 69 |
| #2 | Siljeeeh | +3.01 | 79 | 47 |
| #3 | JUS6 | +2.77 | 87 | 59 |
| #4 | Tumppis | +2.01 | 77 | 84 |
| #5 | Lammu | +1.31 | 68 | 66 |





