








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 36 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 108 matches | ||
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1992 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,294 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1507 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1655 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 861 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1271 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $418,028 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 55 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Amorality22 | 65% | 17 |
| #2 | RangerRick | 61% | 59 |
| #3 | LFT IM/MAIN | 55% | 51 |
| #4 | Warrior | 55% | 33 |
| #5 | Alm1n | 54% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Special-K | 53% | 43 |
| #7 | goose[x5] | 53% | 40 |
| #8 | FuZzY-iwnl | 50% | 10 |
| #9 | mako | 50% | 24 |
| #10 | Mzamfire | 43% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LFT IM/MAIN | 6 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | RangerRick | 5 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | mako | 5 | 0.0100 |
| #4 | goose[x5] | 3 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | Amorality22 | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RangerRick | 305 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #2 | Special-K | 168 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #3 | Warrior | 165 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #4 | LFT IM/MAIN | 162 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | goose[x5] | 117 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RangerRick | +2.78 | 70 | 69 |
| #2 | Amorality22 | +2.00 | 81 | 66 |
| #3 | p0lly | +1.09 | 85 | 51 |
| #4 | Mzamfire | +0.69 | 80 | 63 |
| #5 | FuZzY-iwnl | +0.45 | 74 | 58 |





