








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 376 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 143 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2096 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,228 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1863 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1552 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1854 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 959 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $448,737 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 94 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lucifer | 48% | 25 |
| #2 | Gracuś | 40% | 10 |
| #3 | betoniarka | 40% | 10 |
| #4 | Dazzle | 31% | 16 |
| #5 | kluska♥ | 31% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lucifer | 48% | 25 |
| #2 | Gracuś | 40% | 10 |
| #3 | betoniarka | 40% | 10 |
| #4 | Dazzle | 31% | 16 |
| #5 | kluska♥ | 31% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kluska♥ | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Lucifer | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | betoniarka | 1 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kluska♥ | 62 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #2 | Dazzle | 25 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | Lucifer | 12 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #4 | Gracuś | 2 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| #5 | betoniarka | 1 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SANTA MUERTE | +2.04 | 75 | 65 |
| #2 | Gracuś | +0.13 | 77 | 47 |
| #3 | betoniarka | -1.25 | 44 | 44 |
| #4 | kluska♥ | -1.48 | 48 | 60 |
| #5 | Dazzle | -3.29 | 23 | 50 |





