








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 553 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 126 matches | ||
| Premier | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 76 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




46 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2606 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,754 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4072 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3355 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2880 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2447 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $763,146 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 643 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yoshimar | 76% | 17 |
| #2 | ✪ Sham | 61% | 75 |
| #3 | CJM | 50% | 103 |
| #4 | novit | 50% | 30 |
| #5 | pgifridays ๑ﭥ | 48% | 148 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ✪ Sham | 61% | 75 |
| #3 | CJM | 50% | 103 |
| #4 | novit | 50% | 30 |
| #5 | pgifridays ๑ﭥ | 48% | 148 |
| #6 | Fichoh | 41% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pgifridays ๑ﭥ | 14 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | ✪ Sham | 14 | 0.0097 |
| #3 | CJM | 5 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | novit | 3 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | Yoshimar | 2 | 0.0063 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pgifridays ๑ﭥ | 264 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #2 | ✪ Sham | 258 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #3 | CJM | 165 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #4 | Fichoh | 32 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | novit | 16 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Sham | +6.09 | 88 | 65 |
| #2 | Yoshimar | +2.40 | 82 | 63 |
| #3 | Beluga | +0.86 | 71 | 73 |
| #4 | CJM | +0.19 | 65 | 48 |
| #5 | pgifridays ๑ﭥ | -0.51 | 41 | 55 |





