








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 456 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 241 matches | ||
| Wingman | 71 matches | ||
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3719 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,338 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3589 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3865 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1731 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 3153 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,546,194 of utility $181 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 506 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Harml3ss | 47% | 297 |
| #2 | Panic Sprayer | 46% | 169 |
| #3 | LEGITtopic | 39% | 67 |
| #4 | Fallen | 35% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Harml3ss | 47% | 297 |
| #2 | Panic Sprayer | 46% | 169 |
| #3 | LEGITtopic | 39% | 67 |
| #4 | Fallen | 35% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Harml3ss | 24 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Panic Sprayer | 9 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | LEGITtopic | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Fallen | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Harml3ss | 561 | 0.09 | 15 min |
| #2 | Panic Sprayer | 264 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #3 | Fallen | 241 | 0.28 | 6 min |
| #4 | LEGITtopic | 142 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fallen | +2.36 | 69 | 58 |
| #2 | Panic Sprayer | +0.63 | 66 | 54 |
| #3 | canplayr | +0.41 | 64 | 55 |
| #4 | Harml3ss | -1.01 | 72 | 51 |
| #5 | LEGITtopic | -2.05 | 52 | 49 |





