








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 219 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 39 matches | ||
| Premier | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
958 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,994 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 877 | 29% |
| Smokes | 919 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 391 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 807 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $277,967 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 143 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #15 | fett1s | 58% | 12 |
| #16 | Mamudah | 58% | 12 |
| #17 | ^0^ | 57% | 7 |
| #18 | leuc | 33% | 9 |
| #19 | ADN | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tremko | 6 | 0.0081 |
| #2 | fett1s | 5 | 0.0205 |
| #3 | KlanCS | 4 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | ExampL | 3 | 0.0152 |
| #5 | ^0^ | 3 | 0.0211 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KlanCS | 204 | 0.22 | 6 min |
| #2 | Tremko | 139 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #3 | Mamudah | 56 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #4 | fett1s | 48 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #5 | AyyJyy | 37 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oskvr | +4.99 | 87 | 65 |
| #2 | KlanCS | +2.78 | 89 | 57 |
| #3 | mariooverilike | +2.68 | 89 | 67 |
| #4 | Ace Ventura: Thot Detective | +2.20 | 85 | 62 |
| #5 | ^0^ | +2.03 | 68 | 40 |





