










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1221 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,977 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 926 | 31% |
| Smokes | 769 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 322 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 960 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $270,280 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | maethus | 4 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | AxxA | 3 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | jUSTISMINISTERN | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | Perry | 1 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jUSTISMINISTERN | 270 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #2 | maethus | 83 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #3 | AxxA | 78 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | zeptyy | 54 | 0.26 | 1 min |
| #5 | Perry | 20 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zeptyy | +4.74 | 90 | 59 |
| #2 | jUSTISMINISTERN | +3.31 | 98 | 65 |
| #3 | Perry | +1.70 | 68 | 60 |
| #4 | maethus | +0.31 | 77 | 59 |
| #5 | ッbelhjulaster | -0.08 | 75 | 57 |





