








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 268 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2114 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,485 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1340 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1129 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1051 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 965 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $217,893 of utility $61 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 336 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CPAPi | 61% | 18 |
| #2 | 陪玩不是陪睡 | 60% | 10 |
| #3 | MrBloofking | 42% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CPAPi | 61% | 18 |
| #2 | 陪玩不是陪睡 | 60% | 10 |
| #3 | MrBloofking | 42% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrBloofking | 2 | 0.0084 |
| #2 | CPAPi | 1 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CPAPi | 27 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #2 | MrBloofking | 22 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | 陪玩不是陪睡 | 15 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪かな | +5.45 | 84 | 52 |
| #2 | 陪玩不是陪睡 | +0.70 | 29 | 38 |
| #3 | MrBloofking | +0.58 | 39 | 65 |
| #4 | CPAPi | -2.11 | 56 | 59 |





