








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 73 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 71 matches | ||
| Faceit | 41 matches | ||
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1779 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,846 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2408 | 35% |
| Smokes | 1798 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 803 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 1837 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $443,409 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 421 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s1mzim™ | 48% | 52 |
| #2 | Te$h | 47% | 51 |
| #3 | Corexer | 47% | 77 |
| #4 | arin | 42% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s1mzim™ | 48% | 52 |
| #2 | Te$h | 47% | 51 |
| #3 | Corexer | 47% | 77 |
| #4 | arin | 42% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Corexer | 8 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | s1mzim™ | 6 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | arin | 6 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | Te$h | 3 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Corexer | 194 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | s1mzim™ | 130 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #3 | arin | 129 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | Te$h | 128 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Te$h | +1.96 | 74 | 63 |
| #2 | Corexer | +0.95 | 75 | 60 |
| #3 | Nøgg | +0.93 | 79 | 65 |
| #4 | s1mzim™ | -0.51 | 69 | 63 |
| #5 | arin | -1.96 | 86 | 40 |





