








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1873 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 162 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 138 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 105 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7548 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,829 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3195 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3201 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3652 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1781 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,735,797 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 234 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MillionRock | 53% | 150 |
| #2 | Ťoonz | 52% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MillionRock | 53% | 150 |
| #2 | Ťoonz | 52% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MillionRock | 8 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | Ťoonz | 2 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MillionRock | 313 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #2 | Ťoonz | 49 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pony | +1.35 | 88 | 53 |
| #2 | MillionRock | +0.09 | 36 | 44 |
| #3 | Ťoonz | -3.70 | 28 | 47 |





